My Silent Secret

Upon first look, I don't look much like any other woman. Upon first look, I look like I have full physical capabilities because I can drive. Upon first look, I may get out of my vehicle, at full speed, and head into my destination.

You may not always see my pain. Sometimes it comes and goes. I have good days and bad days. And I never know which it will be until the day begins. It baffles those that live with me so I'm not surprised to have it baffle complete strangers.

On some days, I never get out of bed. I work or study, at my laptop, laying down. Some days I'm in too much pain or too tired from pain or lack of sleep, to take a shower or raise my arms to wash my hair. Many days I live in my pajamas. There are more of those days than I'd like to admit.

I live with the silent pain of fibromyalgia. Sometimes I hurt all over. Sometimes I don't hurt at all. Some specific spots on my body, on my hips and shoulders, can not have any pressure put on them, or I have intense pain. Some nights, I never fall asleep or I don't sleep more than an hour and a half at a time. This ruins my day, the next morning, as I'm too tired to function, from lack of proper rest.

As you scoff when I park in disabled parking, please know that I may not be able to walk back to my vehicle. Please know that I may be in the store, in a back spasm, incapable of moving, or driving myself home.

You don't have to look sick to be disabled.

All I want is less judgment because I'm young and need disabled parking. You can't know what I endure and I hope you never can understand.